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Spring Summer 2016 Newsletters Four

  • April 4, 2016
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Section Four

[newsletter-pulldown]
man-4

On the lighter side……….?

Employment trivia!

A solicitor dies and goes to Heaven.

That in itself must be truly remarkable, but he was obviously good to his granny. At the pearly gates St Peter stands waiting for him. “There must be some mistake,” the solicitor argues. “I’m too young to die. I’m only 55. I’m good for another 25 years employment.”

“55?” says Saint Peter. “No, that’s not right. According to our calculations, you’re at least 82.”

“How’d you get that?” the solicitor asks.

St. Peter replied: “We added up your time sheets. The number of hours you invoiced your clients is the proof that you’re definitely at least 82”

[Thanks to Kate Russell for this one!].

He’ll cop it

Italian police officer Alberto Muraglia has attracted much comment after film was posted of him clocking in for work dressed only in his underpants. He would then go back to his nearby flat to have a lie in! He has been arrested and faces dismissal.

Caring manager?

An 18 year old barmaid was informed that the baby she was carrying had no heartbeat and she needed a termination. When she told her boss at the Hollybush Pub in Herts, he sent a text dismissing her saying that she would not be in the right frame of mind for work! He said she had let him down before and thought he had been very lenient with her. He did add he was sorry about her sad news though, so that makes it better.

Motivation theory

A Korean HR consultancy is getting staff to have a staged mock funeral so that they appreciate their jobs better. The Employees write farewell letters to colleagues before climbing into a casket which is then sealed up!
The President of the business said   “I thought going inside a coffin would be so shocking that it would completely change their mindset”.

Only for those in dead end jobs though?

Selfie destruct!

A 23 year old man from Illinois was interviewed by an Hr Director for a job. She was impressed enough to later call him to offer the position. Soon after this she received two explicit photographs of a naked man with his face (but nothing else) covered. She was clearly distressed by this. The next day the candidate rang to say he would accept the job; and the HR Director realised this was the same phone number responsible for the images she received. She called the police. The offender blamed this on a mix up over his phone numbers! I guess he is still seeking employment!!

Home alone

A recent survey of people working from home claims that, aside from feeling isolated, the thing they missed most was the office gossip!

Thanks for reading …. The next update is planned for Autumn 2016
Best wishes, Derek
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